11:59 pm
Friday
Rooftop
You really did love her, more than anything else in the world. But that was the problem, wasn’t it? You love her so much you always want to be with her, but no matter what you do, you know being with her can never make her happy, not really.
The metal sheet you’re lying on feels cold. You continue to stare at the night sky, wondering if there was really no moon tonight or you’re just too tired to look. The countless stars were a grand sight to watch.
It’s about trust really. She just couldn’t trust you. You’ve been lying all your life that you simply forgot how to tell the truth. Countless of times you hear yourself desperately trying to explain to her the truth, with as much conviction as when you were selling a lie. Then you keep on hoping she’ll somehow see through, somehow she’ll trust you, but she never really did. You even promised her that you’d always be honest, to always tell the truth. But for every truth you sell like a lie, you loose her. And you’ve been loosing her ever since.
You laughed at the irony of it all, and the sound that came out was as empty as your heart. You gazed up at the heavens and found them again, three stars that were almost in a straight line, and five stars in a rough pentagram around it -- Orion, the hunter, killed by misunderstanding.
Maybe it’s time you stop. Maybe you should let her go, let her find her happiness with someone else, someone she could trust, someone better. All these going around in circles, it’s tearing both of you apart. For no matter what you do, somehow you’d always end up hurting her. The only thing you could really promise her is that you’d try to do better, and maybe that is just not enough.
You saw the heavens one last time. They say the stars already dictated your destiny. Maybe she’s just not for you, and there’s nothing in this world you could do about it.
But then again, you really do love her. Yep, that’s it. That’s the problem right there.
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